也許，你我都在偽裝

明明很想哭，卻還在笑。

明明很在乎，卻裝作無所謂。

明明很想留下，卻堅定的說要離開。

明明很痛苦，卻偏偏說自己很幸福。

明明忘不掉，卻說已經忘了。

明明放不下，卻說他是他，我是我。

明明捨不得，卻說我已經受夠了。

明明說的是違心的假話，卻說那是自己的真心話。

明明眼淚都快溢出眼眶，卻高昂著頭。

明明已經無法挽回，卻依舊執著。

明明知道自己很受傷，卻說你不必覺得欠我的。

明明這樣「偽裝」著很累，卻還得依舊......
為的只是隱藏起自己的脆弱，即使很難過，也會裝的無所謂，

只是不願別人看見自己的傷口，
不想讓自己周圍的人擔心，不想讓別人同情自己，

只想在心底獨自承受，雖然心疼的難以呼吸，卻笑著告訴所有人「我沒事的！」 , 
然後靜下來時，自己便笑話自己，何必把自己偽裝的那麼堅強?

好像自己可以承受所有的苦難，這好累......好累......
即使是偽裝，即使很累，只為了不讓蓄積於眼底的淚水流下。
那是蘊藏在眼底的冰冷，一旦溫熱便會洶湧，沖毀我久築的防堤......
只為這一個理由，已足夠。 ,

偽裝堅強，只為不讓脆弱有機可乘，
只為可以一個人在晚上走夜路也不害怕......

扯開嘴角的微笑並不是那麼容易。
你堅強的背後會有一個聲音：
累不累？可已無路可退。 , 

一個人的夜晚，才會最真實吧？！

有時候，我會為自己找一個藉口，讓自己停留； ,
我想為自己找一個藉口，一個讓自己停下來的藉口…

屈结难舒

今日心情唔好，好唔开心.. 有种屈结难舒的感觉.. 我躲起来哭了！

一难过唔开心个心都会心绞痛一直痛一直痛，好难受，.. 好唔舒服！ 

愛著離開他

愛著離開他-

離開一段愛情時，揮手的姿態，有無數種，但分手的心態，只有四種： 

一、無怨無悔。愛過以後，感謝彼此給了對方美好的記憶。 

二、無牽無掛。完全沒有感覺，如同列車開到終點，很自然地下車，沒有愧疚，也不必言謝。 

三、恨著離開。說：「你去死吧，我再也不要見你了！」 

四、愛著離開。說：「我還是很愛很愛你，只是我們在一起的時候不快樂，所以必須分手。」 

無怨無悔，凡人很難企及。若做得到，境界很高。

無牽無掛，沒有感覺，這很正常，忘了他吧，對兩個人都好。

恨著離開，如果不要記仇太久、也沒有發生暴力悲劇，也不算太糟
。
愛著離開，這是最錐心刺骨的一種分手。

被愛的人，不懂地問：「既然愛我，為什麼要分手？」他完全不知道，在相愛的過程中，給了對方多少委屈和傷害。 

只有下定決心要離開的人，才知道愛一個人，若不能同等地被愛，兩個人在一起，也就不能夠真正的幸福快樂。

分手，才是最好的決定。
但是，提出分手的人，通常是被嚴重辜負的一方，直到心痛到無法繼續了，才會愛著離開。 

一位女性朋友最近決定和男友分手。
他曾經不止一次做出傷害感情的事，包括：說謊、劈腿、寧願和朋友徹夜喝酒，也不願主動挪出時間來陪伴她……愛情，在他的生活裡，只是寂寞無聊時，用來墊檔的，但愛情對她而言，卻是生命的全部。 

提出分手的時候，他懊惱萬分地問：「難道妳完全不愛我了嗎？」

女人的安全感，男人的自由心

隨著年齡的增長，你會發現，一段真正刻骨銘心的感情，並不是有著偶像劇裡頭那樣峰迴路轉的劇情，也不是像鄉土劇裡面那麼樣地拋頭顱、灑狗血，更不再是曾經那種「外貿協會」擁護者所呼喊的口號，認為只要對方長得好看，這段感情就會很幸福。

你會發現，當你開始有了工作，或者整天在外地忙碌、與家人幾乎都失去聯絡時，你想要的感情，只是那一種穩定的感覺。

這種感覺並不能夠激起很大的漣漪，但他就像是激起漣漪的海水一般，沒有了他，整片愛情之海就會枯竭。

當你遇到挑戰時，你知道對方會在你的身邊，支持著你繼續一起打拼；當你遇到了一件有趣的事情，你知道對方會在電話裡的那頭分享你的喜悅；當你感到寂寞時，你知道對方的心中也有你的位置，然後你就不再感覺孤單。這樣的感情，雖然沒有很多激情，但是卻包含了更多的元素在裡頭，因為對方就像是你的朋友、家人，甚至是心理治療師。如果兩個人能夠擁有共同的嗜好，譬如說，兩人喜歡一起去健身、看電影，這樣的生活雖然平淡，但卻又異常地充實。

可是要找到一段這樣的感情，可能並不是那麼樣地簡單。

你可能會因為對方一個眼神的不對勁，就開始懷疑對方的忠誠；你可能因為對方與其他異性產生了互動，就認為對方意圖不軌；你甚至可能因為他的一句話語，就開始在心中產生了小劇場，然後追問對方是否就是要演出這樣的劇情。很多人的感情，都在這樣的不安定感之中渡過，冷靜的人可能會讓自己沉澱，然後找對方溝通；不冷靜的人則有可能會盡自己的全力去找尋對方「意圖不軌」的證據，然後把對方逼到死角。

其實，男人和女人在感情裡面需要什麼東西，那是再簡單不過的事情了：「男人需要那一絲的自由；女人則需要那一點的安全感。」

自由和安全感彷彿永遠都在繩子的兩端做拉扯，如果其中一方不願意放棄，那麼雙方就永遠沒有相會的一天。

男人想要自由，哪怕只是那一丁點跟朋友出去透氣的機會，他都不願意放過。我有個朋友，他已經結婚了。在婚前，他是一個浪子，居無定所，喜歡到處玩樂；婚後，他是一個好先生、好爸爸。

直到有一天，他老婆打電話給我，因為她覺得我那位朋友最近很不對勁，不僅在家裡頭悶悶不樂，今天晚上甚至還打扮得很帥氣，說是出門找朋友喝酒去了。

她老婆擔心她老公是不是有了新歡，因為他不想要帶她出門。

我撥了一通電話給我那位朋友。原來，他根本就沒有出去喝酒，他只是坐在他家樓下的公園裡頭的盪鞦韆上，玩著手機裡的小遊戲。

我問他為什麼不老實跟他的太太說，他說：「結婚以後，我老婆從來不准他晚上出門，她甚至擁有我臉書和所有電子信箱的帳號密碼。我很愛她，但我真的很想要出門透透氣，哪怕半個小時也好。」

他的老婆也有話要說：「我每次都看到他在臉書裡面跟其他的異性朋友聊天，雖然聊天的內容都沒有什麼，但我真的很擔心！我曾經不准他跟其他的女生私底下聊天，但他竟然還跟我大吵一架，你說我怎麼能夠放心呢？」

男人要不到自由，他就學會自己去找自由，於是她就失去了安全感。

女人得不到安全感，她就強勢去規定男人，於是他就失去了自由。

雙方都不對，但雙方也都沒有錯。

這則故事的重點，在於雙方的感情，是否建立在互信的制度上。多多溝通，試著去找到雙方的界線，然後適時地放手，相信對方不會越界、各退一步。

妳可以試著讓男人去做他想要做的事情，而你則可以試著讓女人知道你的生活。那麼，男人得到了自由，女人也得到了安全感。

很多時候，這種互信的制度建立了以後，你會感覺你的這段感情，會漸漸地邁向平穩，因為它不再有那麼多地磨擦，而且它也很巧妙地成為你生活中的一部分。

再美的愛情、再堅定的感情，都經不起一次又一次的爭執；兩個人要能夠長久地走下去，並不是用各種的規定去束縛住對方，也不是意氣用事地想要去突破對方的防線，而是能夠互相信任、一起做生活上的決定、一起享受生活，這才是堅貞的愛情。

原文網址 http://www.womany.net/read/article/1752

Chocolate Cheddar Cheese Cake

Change your Words, Change your World

In today Culture Comm. tutorial class, Ms. Tan showed us a meaningful and inspiratable video clips.

It's bout The Power of Words.
Indeed, words can be a powerful weapon, no matter in which industries u r in, escpecially in  business, marketing, advertising industries, Words had been used to persuade, to inform, to portray, to impress.

I remembered previously there is one interruption during lecture class,
A sales executive of Collin Dictionary  from UK is giving a talk for around 1hour+,
well, usually I would just fall asleep in any of dis boring talk.

But! dis UK gentleman is kind of attracting my attention when he asked us some questions n require students to tell the answer, n for return, he is giving out few dictionaries and keychain as rewards.

The first task he asked was, define the following words:
1. Underhand
2. Candid
3. Entitle
4. Corp
5. Lexicographers

Give it a try, how many words dat u actually know the definition?
Guess what?! I only understand what is "Entitle" correctly =..=||| even for "Corp" i tot it meant dead body...zzzZ   U c ? How important is words n the meanings, misunderstanding can occur if u dont really understand the use of the Words n meanings.

Anyway, the Talk is ablout promoting Collin Dictionary of course,
But it also taught me dat how to read those "special signs" in the dictionary =)

This Dictionary is kinda useful, as it is also provided in mobile apps form =D

Okay, the important part,
   At the end of the talk, he gave us a link to download the mobile version dictionary~ Yeepee!
             So, if u wish to download it, u may go to   Here
                      choose which form of dictionary u wish to download n viola !

oh wait wait , before u activate it, here is the password u need to enter yea ; )
Just choose either one of it will do.
6633372768
0282984719
4761946034
6907704743


Lastly, I'm gonna show u guys bout the video my tutor showed me

Heres the Video,
 Enjoy =)

Black Forest Cake

Time flies like an arrow

Few days back Im still wondering what kind of cake i should bake for my Dear Bf birthday

and Today is the day i need to bake a cake !

My first birthday cake creation! =D

Successful~ <3

Since my boss said he wanted a Black Forest Cake,

 So I've chosen a chocolate sponge cake for the body

Too bad, before Im able to snap a photo of whole cake

Already cut and eat by my Dear d  XD

Here are the recipes

巧克力海绵蛋糕:

材料：

A）5粒蛋黄、50g幼糖、80g牛奶、60g玉米油、130g面粉，30g可可粉、1小匙发粉、1小匙香草香精 ~ 拌均匀

B）5粒蛋白、100g幼糖、1/4小匙塔塔粉 ~ 把蛋白打至起泡，加入塔塔粉打发，糖分3次加入，打至湿性发泡。

做法：

将A拌匀，加入B料搅拌至均匀，倒入9寸烤模里。

以140度烤50分钟，取出马上倒扣。

黑森林蛋糕装饰：

1. 横切三片
2. 1罐黑樱桃倒出沥干水分
3. 黑樱桃汁加1大匙糖加1大匙粟粉开中火煮至浓稠度 待冷 
4. 打发鲜奶油，放一片蛋糕在蛋糕板，表面涂上鲜奶油，淋些糖浆拌匀
5. 排些黑樱桃 重复第二片蛋糕，再叠另一片蛋糕
6. 抹上鲜奶油 削巧克力做装饰  排放在蛋糕中间  挤出鲜奶油
7. 挤巧克力淋浆在蛋糕边 

Here are the 2nd cake i bake for my fren's birthday on next day =D

Personality Test 2

Im ~~
69% Choleric,
 69% Sanguine,
 46% Supine,
 69% Melancholy and 54% Phlegmatic!  @__@|||

Hmm...kind of balance wat~ XD

Okay, dis is another personality test my fren wanted me to do~

Each of the elements have it's definition and meaning,
here is the details which i found in wikipedia.

Choleric
Motivation: Power
Needs: To Look Good (Academically), To Be Right, To Be Respected, Approval
Wants: To Hide Insecurities (Tightly), To Please Self, Leadership, Challenging Adventure
Positives: Independent, Have Goals, Know How They Want to Solve a Problem, Decisive, Visionary
Negatives: Cruel, Egotis

tical, Unemotional, Domineering, Unforgiving

Melancholy
Motivation: Intimacy
Needs: To Be Good (Morally), To Be Understood, To Be Appreciated, Acceptance,
Wants: To Reveal Insecurities, To Please Others, Autonomy, Security
Positives: Gifted, Self Sacrificing, Helpful, Thoughtful, Faithful
Negatives: Moody, Critical, Negative, Resentful, Suspicious

Phlegmatic
Motivation: Peace
Needs: To Feel Good (Inside), To Be Understood, To Be Respected, Acceptance, To Reveal Insecurities
Wants: To Please Others, Protection, Contentment
Positives: Peace Makers, Quiet, High Self Control, Calm in a Crisis, Efficient, Good Listener
Negatives: Unmotivated, Procrastinate, Indecisive, Fearful, Avoider

Sanguine
Motivation: Fun
Needs: To Look Good (Socially), To Be Popular, To Be Praised, Approval
Wants: To Hide Insecurities (Loosely), To Be Noticed, Freedom, Playful Adventure
Positives: Entertaining, Outgoing, Responsive, Warm, Friendly
Negatives: Undependable, Undisciplined, Egotistical, Prone to Exaggeration, Compulsive Talker

Supine
Motivation: Contribution
Needs: To Look Humble, To Serve a Greater Purpose, To Be Accepted, To Protect Weaknesses.
Wants: Recognition for Service, Opportunities to Serve, To Contribute to a Higher Calling, To Be Protected
Positives: Caring, Giving, Gentle, Dependable, Loyal
Negatives: Insecure, Manipulative, Weak Willed, Indecisive, Harbors Ill Will

Lost in L0v3

Have you ever feel that the ones you together for some time, totally like a stranger to you ?

     You have no idea what's in his thoughts,

          Why would he do such actions.... or even hiding something from you? Maybe?


There's nothing more pathetic than having a relationships that built with untruthful communication- lies, hiding some facts, keeping secrets, misunderstanding, lazy to explain, making excuses to cover up etc. All these will only lead to a sad ending.

How can a relationship lasts without trust? okay...lets look at the deeper views,

Big problem here, Why there is no trust ?
Somehow, the examples i told earlier, is obviously the roots of the communication problems.

See, I have to admit dat even me, myself is a communication student, but my communication failed.
It is so sad to say that I'm such a failure person... ='(

Communication should be 2 ways interactions. how can a communication process be successful if only I'm only the one keep talking?

So when i calmed down, i begins to realize...
    I actually know nothing bout dis guy... just like I doesnt belong to his world...
          He is just trying to enjoy his life by doing things he likes...
                I thought dat we should share our life together, or only I'm the only one who think so?
            and for so long after we together,
      I had never know "dat side" of you.
This really scare the shit out of me!!!

Who are you seriously?


I don't know whether I can accept all of you.....


to accept or reject....is still a question.

I'm an ENFJ

Curious on what is meant by ENFJ?

ENFJ is actually  is an abbreviation used to refer one of the sixteen types of personality.

after completing all sorts of the long questionairre,
finally the result is out, so Im typically an ENFJ kind of person,
and here is the brief explanation:

• E – Extraversion preferred to introversion: ENFJs often feel motivated by their interaction with people. They tend to enjoy a wide circle of acquaintances, and they gain energy in social situations (whereas introverts expend energy).

• N – Intuition preferred to sensing: ENFJs tend to be more abstract than concrete. They focus their attention on the big picture rather than the details, and on future possibilities rather than immediate realities.

• F – Feeling preferred to thinking: ENFJs tend to value personal considerations above objective criteria. When making decisions, they often give more weight to social implications than to logic.

• J – Judgement preferred to perception: ENFJs tend to plan their activities and make decisions early. They derive a sense of control through predictability.